Well, this could be the title of my autobiography…
I have always loved flea markets, swap meeting, garage sales, open air markets. There is something so old world about it all. All these old items, brought forward and presented in new ways. I just love the creativeness of it all. I also like finding the deal, the bargain. The thing that I don’t really need, like at all, but love with a passion that should really be reserved for men, or my children, or something with a soul. But I am not a person who reserves passion only for those things, no I am the person that gets so much pleasure out of meandering through the narrow passages between booths that I am sure hold something that I cannot live without…
Last night I found myself at the Great Junk Hunt for the third year in a row. I was there the first year with girlfriends, last year with a boyfriend and this year solo. And I think I have to say that I liked being solo best. I didn’t feel left out when I saw all the other women with their friends. Or feel badly when I saw the beleaguered and weary faces of the men the other women towed behind. I was happy to be alone, left to wander, gaze and be amazed all by myself. I took my time. I enjoyed. I relished. I was judicious in my choices.
It is a kind of high for me. The looking, the finding, the curating. My entire home is curated ala junking. Everywhere I look there is some vestibule from a distant past, mine or someone else’s. And I love it. These old things, make me happy on some level that is probably not normal. But I am not normal and we all know that by now!
Last night I just enjoyed being there amongst the stuff. I loved the holiday music playing. The festive food. The possibility of finding that diamond in the rough. I always come away with some gem. Last night’s find was a German glass jar (quite large) from the 1800s. These things usually cost a fortune! She wanted $50, I offered $40 and now it is mine. Of course, I do not have a place for it yet, or even know what I am going to do with a giant glass jar from Germany. I just knew that I it was a deal and I wanted it. I know I will find a purpose for it. Right now it sits on my kitchen counter becoming acquainted with all the other junk that resides there. Rest assured, I will for sure find a home for it!
I also bought a vintage Christmas ornament for a friend and some vintage silver rings for someone else. I could have bought a million other things but I didn’t. I am really trying to work on my shopping issues. Again, still.
Regardless, of me kind of being like a heroin addict walking through a shooting gallery, I think I did pretty well. I got out of there for under $100 and that is very good all things considered.
There is something about me that feels compelled to gather old things that other’s might well call junk and rehab them in some way or fashion, breathing new life and blood into them. In truth, I have done this with men, pets, relationships, furniture, clothing, shoes, fuck, I guess I could go on, but you get that I have this penchance for finding old things, in need of repair, and bringing them home…
I am working on this. I really am. And last night, I had a great time and am only out $100 with several gifts purchased. Super grateful for that.
I think I will never get over my great hunt for junk…and mostly I think that is a blessing. But I do see where this same drive has caused me to make some choices in my life that didn’t work out all that well for anyone. So I will continue to do the work required to improve those areas of my life.
Until then, my car will stop at every little roadside stand, large or small, in search of something that is innately lacking in my character. Again, still.