I have been a big believer all my life of changing the outside stuff to encourage, in fact force, internal shifts. What I have learned is that you can’t. No matter what your external conditions, you can and will remain stubbornly the same person, until and unless you do the hard internal work to change.

I know. I have changed so many external things in my life…it is kind of ridiculous.

Last year this time I was in the middle of trying desperately to make a relationship work, I was changing all the external stuff in the hopes that this time, it would get me a…