I am headed home today. And just the thought of leaving him behind, again, challenges my concept of home. I am going to a place where he will not be. And that doesn’t sit right with me, but I know, him living at home creates a home life that is…

I did yoga on the dock yesterday. I meditated there as well. It was a beautiful day here in Alaska. Warm, sunny, and when you are in a place where it rains a lot, days like yesterday stand out. They feel special, because of their rarity. …

I am not ready to talk more about how I feel about my son. Instead, I seem to be leaning towards talking about nudity instead. Sleeping nude to be specific. I have endeavored to be transparent, raw, naked. And I will, but I am not ready to give up that…

Well here I am again. On a ferry, in Alaska, leaving my son behind…again. It feels like too much to ask of me, his mother. I have done so much of this over the last year, all in an effort to save him, from himself. I am not sure this…

So we arrived last night in Ketchikan. It was lovely and cool and the clouds were putting on a lovely evening sunset show. The bald eagles were feasting on salmon and I got to watch the young birds hunt and fish. It was amazing. I always feel somewhat high when…

I am so grateful he came home last night. I was so worried that his deceptive skills got better and he hatched a plan to runaway without me even noticing. Then I thought he stole his ebike and planned on selling it. I will likely never know why he took…

As in alcoholism… what is the ism really? I heard someone say that “ism” stood for “internal spiritual malady”. And that resonated with me. It is amazing to me that I spent so much of my young life searching for a spiritual solution: churches, religions, spiritual books and ideas, philosophy…

The cat is out of the bag, no police were called so that is good. He is refusing to go but there is a lot of real estate between now and next week. The biggest obstacle for him is really now, me. I waver. I feel sorry. I allow my…

I feel it. I have to deliver some really bad news to someone today and it feels like too much. I know I have to do it. But I really, really don’t want to. I am scared of their response, scared that my guilt will cause me to give in…