In living. In divorcing. On Mondays. Pain is an integral part of life and that comes to some of us as pretty awful news. I spent the first half of my life attempting to avoid pain and seek pleasure. It landed me in a pretty horrible spot. And I also…

Sometimes you just need to move. Locations. Relationships. Bedrooms. Houses. Friendships. Whatever. Sometimes the move can be slight, other times perhaps something more drastic. We moved bedrooms yesterday. Lots of reasons. Some good, some bad. We needed a perspective change. We also needed to provide room for my business. There…

Contempt…the Beginning of the End. There was a longitudinal study done where marriages were observed over time. The people whose marriages were observed were having issues which is what brought them to a therapist’s office in the first place. They followed these marriages for the next 20 years. And they…

Happy St. Patrick’s Day! This day every year reminds me of the end. The end of my drunken debauchery. The end of the life that was the only one I knew until the day that I knew something different. Drinking was part of my life, always. I loved it. It…

This post is really for those people getting a divorce. But it just might apply to others as well. I am an oversharer. I say way too much about everything. I am wordy and do not seem to have an appropriate filter. But I learned…and if I can, so can…

I moved to California in 2006. And I have lived here most of the time since with brief, ill advised moves to Florida that have punctuated my California time. I love it I here. I really do. I want more land but other than that, I am so lucky to…

Relationships being over and ending are not the same thing. As I posted yesterday, most relationships are over long before they end. We seem to habitually put off the ending, because it is so fraught with strife, turmoil, hurt feelings, and loss. I believe we grieve even our worst relations…

Receiving support, for some of us, this does not come easy. There are so many of us in the world whose participation in relationships is for what we can give, not what we can get. I don’t know how often I felt unseen, unimportant, unvalued, unattended to, unpresent in some…

We call things that go wrong in our lives “shit shows” or “dumpster fires” but after watching a movie this past weekend, I am changing all of that…when things in your life really go sideways, at least for me, it is really more like a warehouse fire. I mean have…